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In all my travels I've picked up some wisdom from various people;
When I was feeling seriously angry at the friend I was travelling with, a Frenchman told me "To understand absolutely everything about someone is to forgive them absolutely"
When I was worried about turning 30 a Canadian told...read more
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I was teaching English to a Spanish student, she showed me a confusing text from her boyfriend and asked me to translate it. It said "I want to kick your puppy". I had to explain about the intricacies of predictive text...god!
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When I was in the girl guides we had a stall at a local jumble sale. An old couple came up to our stall and started looking at our jumble, they were pretty friendly and the man said 'hello there girls, how are you doing?' then paused, 'oh, and one lad in there amongst you, how are you doing there...read more
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Sent my jacket off to get drycleaned. Then went to a conference a week later, wearing my jacket for the first time. I noticed halfway through that someone nearby had the worst BO I'd ever smelt, then I realised that the reek of stale urine was actually coming from me. When I asked at the Dry...read more
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I was on a stag do in Berlin with some guys and the last thing I remember is walking into a beer tent with a couple of steiners. When I woke up the next day I had the tattered shreds of my Y fronts pulled up beyond my trousers. My so called friends had given me such a big wedgie they're totally...read more
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When I lived in Belgium, I was organising the office party. I got sent the "vegetarian" men and noticed the salads all had chicken in them. I called up the restaurant and asked them about it and said "oh but there's chicken in the veggie dishes". The guy just said "ah, but mademoiselle, ze...read more
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I went for a Shiatsu massage the other day and while I was lying on my front and the guy was massaging my back I suddenly felt a warm package resting in the palm of my upturned hand. Basically he'd carefully placed his trousered balls in my palm and carried on with the massage. I tried really...read more
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I was in Mumbai wearing a t shirt and shorts and this French lady started lecturing me about how I was dressed inappropriately, she was so goddam annoying and French, I wanted to give her a slap but didn't, I really regret that!
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When I was sixteen I went to a club with my friend. We met a new PE teacher there from our school. He drove me home and even though he knew I was a student, we had a cheeky snog in his car, bit naughty really!
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After spending two weeks volunteering on an archaeology project (which was pretty hard work), the team leader took me and some colleagues out for a meal. At the end, he got up to talk to the waitress, and asked her to split the bill. When he sat backed down I thanked him for the meal, but he went...read more
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